Waffles

The main problem I had with waffles was that they would stick to the iron.  When I’d open it up, the waffles would tear in half across its entire width; The top half would be stuck to the top griddle of the iron and the bottom half would be stuck to the bottom griddle. Prying these off the burning hot iron was no fun chore, and of course setting these torn bits back together never resulted in an appealing presentation.

Even with non-stick irons I had this problem.

Eventually I decided there were two main sources to my troubles. The first, obviously, was that the waffle was sticking to the griddle. Secondly, I was opening the iron too soon, so the waffle's interior was not fully cooked, making it structurally sound.

Eventually I settled on a technique that has served me well. For this approach, you will need the following:

• Waffle iron (obvious, but I am a pedant)
• Waffle batter.
• Spray oil
• Basting brush. I prefer a silicone one, but the old-school paintbrush style will work as well. I just always seem to loose bristles out of those.
• A bamboo skewer. This will be used to pry free the waffle. Alternatively, a wooden chopstick with the point sharpened via some whittling will work well.

Ready for action

First, make sure the iron is fully heated before pouring the batter. Ideally, use an iron that beeps when it is fully heated. And, ideally, will beep again when the waffle is done.

When the iron is hot, spray the top and bottom griddles with oil. Then use the brush to work the oil into every nook and cranny of the griddles. This will take 10-20 seconds, as there are a lot of surfaces you need to run the brush over.  

Spraying the griddle

One of the major challenges of writing this book has been taking pictures with my right-handed DSLR camera while trying to use tools with my left hand.  It'll be interesting to see how the section on wood-working turns out.

Okay, now pour on the batter. There are many approaches here, but allow me to suggest that the instinct of pouring into the center of the iron is not optimal. That way, the batter has to spread out all the way to the edges. If instead you pour the batter in a circle or square halfway between the edges and the center, the batter can spread out both inwards and outwards, resulting in an easier way to get a uniform thickness of batter.  

I've found a measuring cup is good tool for pouring the batter into the iron, because it allows me fine control of the pour. If you're pouring directly out of a bowl, the larger size of the bowl may make it difficult to pour the batter given the constraints of the open iron lid. Also, you can use the bottom of the measuring cup to spread the batter out.

You want, as noted ,to get a uniform thickness of batter. Do make sure that all of the bottom of the griddle is filled and you can not see any of the griddle's peaks showing up. Sometimes those holes will get filled by the expanding batter, but not always. So, just make sure there are no holes in the batter before you close it and you know you're good.

Close that lid.

Now, if you've put in too much batter (which is common for me when using a new iron), it'll goosh out the sides. Depending on your counter type, it might make sense to place the waffle iron into a large, flat baking sheet. That way any spilled batter falls onto the pan, rather than your counter. I was using a new, butter intensive recipie and that pan proved to be a good idea. Large amounts of the butter jetted out the sides of the iron. I think the hot iron basically vaporized the butter.

Anyway, after the iron is closed, wait for it to go beep. If you have a non-beeping iron, keep an eye on it. Once the steam starts dying down, its going to get close. Try and inspect the waffle's doneness by looking at the edge between the two griddles. Keep in mind that edge is going to be less cooked than the rest of the waffle, as no heat is directly be applied to it. If it looks done, try very slowly opening the lid. If it opens cleanly, than you can inspect the waffle surface. If it's not done, you can obviously close the lid and wait a bit longer. If the waffle starts tearing (I want to say: delaminating), then close the lid and wait longer still.

When the waffle is indeed done, open the lid slowly. If there is any stickage, use the bamboo skewer to free the sticking portion from the griddle. Seriously, the bamboo skewer is the perfect tool for removing waffles from a grabby iron.

The waffles freed from their imprisonment

I'll just note that the stickiest batter seems to be from the instant mixes. When I used a recipe from scratch that allowed for half a stick of butter per waffle, I assure you there was very little danger of that waffle sticking to anything!

If you grate the butter, it melts very quickly.

Ladders

If you're just renting an apartment, you can probably get by without a ladder just fine. Once you become a homeowner, however, a good ladder will be extremely useful. When I was growing up, most step-ladders were wooden and got wobbly with age. This infirmament typically manifested with the steps and vertical supports cracking. Today stepladders are commonly made of fiberglass. One of these will easily last decades.

The main thing to consider when you buy a ladder is how tall you need it to be. That is obviously going to be a function of what you're going to use it for. Almost certainly it will depend on the height of your ceilings. Relative to your ceiling, there are three main heights of interest: the heights of hanging lights, the height of the ceiling itself for replacing flush-mounted light fixtures, and higher than the ceiling (for getting into the attic space

If you get a ladder that allows you to touch your ceiling while standing on a safe step (usually one below the one labeled do not stand on or above this step) , that will let you change all the lightbulbs in your house, including the flush-mounted ones typically found in closets and bathrooms. That will also let you install new light fixtures and/or ceiling fans, and put decorations on the top of your cabinets, if you have such things.

The only reason to get a taller ladder is if you're going to need to get into the air space above the ceiling. I typically get in there to run wiring for speakers and networks, to do roof leak repair (very rare!), once to get rid of a small rat problem (they climbed trees to enter the attic space via rooftop air vents. The answer was D-Con to remove the current population and to trim the trees so they could not climb up that way anymore), and to do repairs to the HVAC. If you're not going to be undertaking such advanced projects, you probably don't need an extra tall ladder. And, actually, I didn't get a taller ladder either. I just carefully stand on the very top of the ladder (which is definitely not safe) and pull myself up into the airspace by grabbing on to the joists. This technique works for me because I'm a strong climber and can pull myself up using only my arms.. I'm similarly able to lower myself back down to the ladder hanging on only by my hands. This is obviously not a technique that is recommended or safe for the average person.

If you're going to want to get onto your roof for advanced outdoor projects (leak repairs and, you know, rooftop rat issues), you're probably going to want to get an aluminum extension ladder. This can apparently also be used for traversing crevasses the next time you're on a glacier, although I haven't personally tried that. Yet.

I also get up onto our roof every year to hang Christmas lights. This is much faster than hanging from the ground, as you don't need to keep moving the ladder. It's also much more dangerous. It is really easy to fall off roofs, even if you do it for a living. So, don't go up there unless you have a really good understanding of friction, a working knowledge of your personal center of masses, know how to stand on a roof, how to step on a roof, how not to crawl backwards off the edge of a roof, and how not to step on a normal-looking tile that is actually loose and serves as your personal sled down the roof and over the edge.

I read an anecdote once in Reader's Digest about a construction worker who lost his balance and slid off a roof. "This is the part I hate about this job," he allegedly quipped. From my proximity to the construction trade and similar events, I'm not sure there's really enough time for such wit before you hit the ground. Usually there’s time for about half of an expletive before impact.

I was on an extension ladder once when it slipped out from beneath me. We had placed the ladder on a tarp to ensure that paint did not drip on the driveway. That proved slippery enough for the ladder feet to slide out once I got to the top. Luckily I was able to grab onto the railing when it happened, so I just had to hang there shouting for someone to please put the ladder back into place. Yeah, that's how I spent my teenage summers. Good times.

Apart from my time learning to build houses without using the safety equipment that is common practice these days, I also had the good fortune to serve as a theatrical lighting technician for severals years in high school and college. These times taught me a lot about how to move ladders around, both horizontally and vertically.

Here's a heads up: ladders are very good for damaging things while you are carrying them around. Even though you can't see them, apparently they stick out quite a bit behind you when you're carrying them horizontally.

When you carry them vertically, that helps the horizontal blind spot problem, but you're going to have a hard time keeping an eye on both their tip high up in the air and where you are walking. Move slowly and expect collateral damage as you gain expertise.

All kinds of ladders are dangerous, especially when you're standing on them. The technical head of our drama department at college used to come in and see me standing on a ladder in a particular fashion and just shake his head. He used this gesture to indicate I was not using the safest of practices, but he wasn't going to say anything because I was working for minimum wage and putting up lights faster than anyone else.

But, some general safety tips.

Always face the ladder. You should never turn around so your back is to the ladder when you are standing on it.

When reaching out to the side, you really shouldn't. But, because there are times when you are going to anyways, you want to keep your center of mass (say, your belt buckle) between the vertical uprights of your ladder. Now, technically you can reach further to the side by stretching one of your legs way out in the opposite direction. This is quite dangerous, and I only do it sometimes when I really am feeling confident in my abilities (i.e. always) You, however, definitely should not do this.

Ladders can fall in really interesting ways, and by interesting, I mean painful.

Do not leave any tools or parts on top of the ladder. This is an easy mistake to make. You leave some screws or a hammer on top of the ladder and climb down to get a different tool or more parts. You get distracted or perhaps interrupted. You come back to the ladder and think "while I'm down here, I might as well move this over here to get closer to that thing I'm working on." Then you get to experience a heavy rain. So, each time you climb down the ladder, be sure to take down any items you've set down. Open paint buckets are an excellent thing not to leave on top of a ladder. They actually sell ladder accessories that let you store tons of tools on the top. You are tempting fate if you populate one of these with sharp and pointy tools.

If you're using a step ladder, always make sure the two hinges are fully open and in their locked position.

Not good.

Good

All ladders need solid footing. For step ladders, this means four on the floor. No wobbling. For extension ladders, the two feet need to be solidly on the ground with the ladder pointing up right. It is easy to have a ladder point upright with just one foot on the ground, only for it to shift sideways as you climb up it. If you are high enough up, it is very straightforward for the ladder to keep on rotating sideways until you are on the ground. This brief but eventful journey may be made more exciting by the top of ladder coming off the roofline and falling in the other direction towards the house.

When using an extension ladder, make sure the top of the ladder sticks up well above whatever you're resting it on. But don't climb too far, or your weight above the pivot point could create a disaster.

Not good.

Good!

When using extension ladders, make sure the bottom isn't going to slide out. Usually there's a sticker telling you when the angle is right.

Never stand on the ladder and on another thing at the same time. This can cause the ladder to slide out away from you.

Ideally, always be thinking of what you're going to grab onto when the ladder slides out from under you. If the answer is there is nothing to grab on to, this is an indication that you must be extra cautious.

Despite what you may infer from my narratives below, I have never been injured when working on ladders. May you have similar fortune!

Introduction

Growing up, I was always amazed by my father’s ability to fix almost anything. Part of his skills came from his job of running a construction company. He personally knew how to build a complete house starting with an undeveloped piece of land.  When things broke, like a chainsaw or lawnmower, he'd tinker with it until it started running again.

I had no idea how he did much of this.  Over the years, I learned some of his home construction skills by spending my summers working for him.  Apart from this I also ended up being exposed to other interesting situations wherein I learned other abilities.  I never really thought I would be able to develop my dad's amazing skills, but in the years since his death, I believe I have amassed my own interesting collection of capabilities.  

As I said, I learned much of my mechanical skills working for my dad's construction company, but since I do not have a construction company myself, I cannot pass on my this knowledge to my children in such a manner.  Plus, there are many novel things I've learned under atypical circumstances that my kids are unlikely to experience.  

Hence, this book (as currently instantiated in a Dickensian fashion in this blog).  This is for my children, an informal textbook on building and fixing things, solving problems, cooking, photography, philosophy, and living a good life. Perhaps there will be some tidbits in here that are interesting to you as well.